Baby Steps

My parents got here yesterday and I honestly could not be happier to have them here! We had a great day walking through San Francisco, taking them to a couple of our favorite places [Liguria, Lai Hong Lounge, Rogue], I cooked up a pretty tasty dinner [if I do say so myself ;)], and we polished off the last of the cheesecake

.

Mom Dad Golden Gate Bridge

I wanted to preface this post by saying that I actually wrote it last week. Though, I didn’t really want to hit publish on Valentine’s Day so I saved it. My feelings, unfortunately, haven’t budged since then [sorry ma], but I can guarantee you, I’m going to enjoy the hell out of this week with my parents. It’s the best.


You know that saying “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence”?  Somehow I always forget how true it really is. I’ve been doing my best over the last couple months to roll with the punches but damn, change is hard. It’s not that I thought moving to California would make everything easier because trust me, leaving my family and friends was not easy. It still isn’t easy and I certainly have my off days.

Grass is greener

Rather than complaining about something, Nathan and I might say “welp.. that was a day” or “ok, that was food” [not that that ever happens in my kitchen ;)] and let’s just say last week was a week. I’ve been turned down from some pretty silly jobs since I’ve moved and while it might get me down one day, I might also laugh at it the next. You’re telling me I’m under-qualified for what?! Yea.. it happens. So I’ll concentrate on what I know best—eating and working out. Except somehow that was working better for me a year ago too.

I know I’ve mentioned feeling like I’ve found my stride in my food and workouts. That I feel like my body is regulating. And then shit hits the fan in another aspect of life and suddenly I’m questioning myself again. I find myself looking at my wedding pictures and thinking I had the willpower to do it then, so why not now? Sure, it might just be a couple pounds since the wedding but when I’m having a crappy day, I feel it and I see it. I thought I figured out my food and my workouts are consistent, as always, so what gives?

The other night I decided to take a look back at a week of food and workouts I tracked on My Fitness Pal. Turns out, I was consistently burning about 4000 calories from workouts per week. Now? We’re looking at about 2500 or so. Oh, so there’s a change in my body? Go freaking figure. I can share posts about throwing out the scale until I’m blue in the face, but it’s really easier said than done.

Screw the scale

Remember this little post? Yea. A year ago I was doing a minimum of 45 minutes of cardio everyday. Minimum! And you know what? I still wanted more out of myself. I’ve learned a bit since then and significantly cut back on my cardio but seeing the changes in my body makes sometimes makes me reconsider. And then I remember that I’m still getting my workouts in and I have better things to do than spend that much time on a machine.

Driving Cardio SomeEcards

I wish so, so hard that I didn’t feel this way. I wish that I could just enjoy my damn self. I wish that I could just say screw willpower and really mean it. My time will come when I truly accept my body for the way it is and what it can do. And we will figure out life in California. And I’ll figure out what the hell I’m supposed to do with my life. One step at a time. They may be baby steps right now, but we’ll get there.

In the meantime, I’m going to [try to] forget my crazy and make the most out of my time with my parents this week. I can guarantee you I wouldn’t have more fun if I had a 6-pack. Almost. Right?

Food for Thought

Do you question yourself?

Breaking Routine

People tell you to find a routine that works for you. One that you know you’ll stick to. That’s how you become successful, right? I found my routine. I was successful. And then I moved across the country and everything was thrown out the window.

San Francisco California CA

Oh hey, Cali 🙂

I noticed that I was taking advantage of the hotel meals and drinks that I wouldn’t normally have and things were slowly creeping up on me. And when I say me, I mean my waistline. Not to mention, being in a new place and wanting to explore the areas and amazing restaurants proved to be irresistible. It stressed me out and I was seriously craving routine.

Ramen Shop Veggie Shoyu Meyer Lemon

Holy ramen!

I was afraid of what my scale would show after almost 9 weeks away from it. It’s crazy, I know. I figured I would unpack our boxes, push the scale aside, and wait a couple weeks until I felt more comfortable. I opened up the first box and there it was. Go freaking figure. But I did as I had hoped; I put it away and forgot about it. Honestly, I had too much crap around me to concern myself with a piece of plastic to stand on.

What’s great about routine is that when you break one, you can create a new one. As we were getting settled in our new place, I found my new routine. And after less than a week of getting back to my real oatmeal breakfasts, huge salads for lunch, and home-cooked dinners, I also found myself feeling much more comfortable in my skin again. I felt good and I wanted to get past the scale anxiety.

Kale Cabbage Sugar Snap Peas Tomatoes Carrots Roasted Corn Hemp Seed Sriracha Avocado Honey Mustard

Helloooooooo big salads!

Now, what’s funny about routine, is that sometimes you just need to break it. Everyone says you should shake it up a bit every now and then. I honestly believe that from spending almost 2 months of eating differently, my body completely readjusted. Less than a week of my old “norm” and my body went right back too. Hell of an idea, right? The number that I saw last Tuesday was the same number that I saw 2 months ago before I packed that baby up!

There’s been a lot of talk about not setting New Year’s resolutions, but having a word to set the tone for the year. I decided my word would be trust. I need to learn to trust myself more. I need to learn to listen to my body more. And if there is one thing that these past couple months have taught me, it’s that my body truly does know what’s best. Want a sandwich? Eat a sandwich. Want a couple fries? Steal them from Nathan’s plate 😉 Craving some ice cream? Get. Some damn. Ice cream.

San Francisco Creamery Co Apple Pie

Worth it.

Knowing that I’m making healthy decisions everyday when I go to the gym, eat my protein oats, have a huge salad, and load up on veggies with my dinner makes it that much easier to enjoy a treat every now and then. I’ve been reading other blogs and people have been coming to this realization every single day. Everyone just need to make that realization in their own time and I’m glad my time found me.

Washington Square Park San Francisco California CA

Now excuse us as we enjoy the 70 degree weather 😉

Food for Thought

Are you an intuitive eater or do you set a schedule or meal plan?

Link Love #18: My Top 5

Happy New Years Eve!! Wow, I can’t believe the year is over.. it seems like it just began. It’s time to wrap this baby up and look forward to creating new goals [and achieving them!], new experiences, and new memories. I usually use my link love posts to share some of my favorite posts from the blogosphere, but in the spirit of wrapping up this year, I thought I’d share my top 5 most popular posts and my top 5 favorites from this past year.

Most Popular

5. What I Ate Wednesday #4 – 5 Day Slim Down Edition!

What I Ate Wednesday WIAW 5 Day Slim Down Tone It Up TIU

That’s a tasty pineapple protein pancake!

I most certainly have some Tone It Up ladies to thank for this being up there in numbers! People seriously want to know about that slim down. It’s no joke.. you need to be really dedicated and if you are, it really works!

4. Spaghetti Squash Kugel

Spaghetti Squash Kugel Passover Recipe Barr & Table

Definitely making this again soon!

Between Passover and all of the Paleo and low carb diets, it’s no wonder this recipe was a hit! And have you ever had kugel? YUM! Give me my kitchen!

3. Recipe Remix: Carrot Cake Protein Pancakes

Barr & Table Carrot Cake Protein Pancakes About Time Cinnamon Swirl Whey Protein Powder Flax Cottage Cheese Egg White Cinnamon Almond Milk Agave Nectar Salt

Ooh baby! I almost forgot about these.

I love my sweet breakfasts and anyway I can sneak a little veggie in there makes it that much more perfect.

2. Foodie Friday: Peanut Butter Wonderful Powerballs

Peanut Butter Co White Chocolate Wonderful Powerballs Perfect Fit Protein Coconut Flax Chia Hemp Barr & Table

Everything is better with peanut butter!

My first attempt at protein bites and they were a delicious success! I definitely recommend this recipe.

1. Minty Irish Powerballs

Barr & Table Minty Irish Powerballs Cashew Butter Perfect Fit Protein

The perfect mix of chocolatey, nutty, and minty!

How do you make a protein bite better? Use your homemade nut butter 😉

My Top 5 Recipe Posts

Barr & Table Link Love Top 5 Recipes
Eggy Quinoa Stuffed Squash
Coconut Flour Pancake Variations
Homemade Cashew Butter
Buddha’s Feast
Chipotle Lime Sweet Potato Tofu Burgers

My Top 5 Life Posts

Barr & Table Link Love Top 5 Life

Hitched
Dealing With Doubt
I’m grateful for…
The “S” Word
Baltimore Bucket List and Big News!

My Top 5 What I Ate Wednesday Posts

Barr & Table Link Love Top 5 What I Ate Wednesday WIAW

#44: Wine in Italy
Quick Honeymoon Update
#45: The Wedding Food
#59: Ten Years Gone
#64: The First Weekend

Food for Thought

Do you have an all-time favorite post from this past year?
Any big plans for NYE?

The “S” Word

I’m a numbers person. Always have been. Changing my lifestyle 2+ years ago and losing 30 lbs made me a bit more of a numbers person, for better or worse. As for many people, the scale became my friend and my enemy, depending on the day. It’s really hard to keep yourself from getting caught up in all the hubbub of working out, eating healthy, losing weight, etc. Especially if you’re one to read many blogs, follow people on Instagram, or just plain read magazines.

There’s the comparison trap; feeling the need to eat “perfectly” day in and day out, make sure you log enough miles at the gym, or lift heavy enough weights just so you can look like that other person. That person who posts their breakfasts, lunches, and dinners to Instagram many days.. and then you think, “if they ate it, why can’t I?<– One of my favorite posts!

Food Trap Comparison

Right, Giselle? 😉

You know this feeling, right?

I’m not the only one that gets in these funks, right?

When I was packing up my apartment in Baltimore with my mom, we grabbed a box for the bathroom and she pointed to the scale and said “don’t forget that.” Done. Packed up. Didn’t even give it any thought. Until later that night when I realized I would be scale-less for at least 6 weeks. Make that closer to 9 weeks by the time we get our stuff in our apartment..

A bit of panic set in knowing that I wouldn’t be knowing for quite some time. The last time I was scale-less for an extended period of time was 2 weeks on my honeymoon.. and that didn’t end so pretty! I have to admit that most days, I don’t even give it any thought. But I definitely have my days where I think about what it will say when I finally do see it again. After 6 weeks of living in a hotel and flipping my life and routine upside down, it scares me.

Sure, I’m having a hell of a time exploring this new city I’m in. Nathan and I can’t call ourselves foodies if we don’t take advantage of all of the incredible cuisine there is to offer here! And I’ve shared all of the amazingly wonderful salads I’ve found, but in reality, hotel living is not the healthiest way to go. Especially on a budget.

Kevins Quinoa Kale Butternut Squash Bowl Evolution Fresh

Ohh, Evolution Fresh. I wish I could eat your salads everyday!

What I don’t show you is the glass of wine that I’ve become accustomed to every night. Or the oatmeal raisin cookies that they give out with dinner that sometimes I just can’t say no to. Or maybe having so many options for breakfast everyday that I end up taking “just a little extra” because I can’t decide. And while this may not sound like I’m overdoing it, I often feel that way. Maybe it’s when I’m homesick, maybe it’s when I’m tired, maybe I just get frustrated for no reason, but sometimes it just. Freaking. Sucks.

I know, in the long run, I won’t look back at my experiences and think “damn, I really wish I didn’t eat that extra cookie or have that extra beer.” But I do know that sometimes I get caught up in the moment. And sometimes that moment is with the scale. And sometimes that moment with the scale is total shit. And writing this right now, I’m scared to have that shit moment in the near future. But I also need to remind myself of this..

And I need to focus on getting caught up in these moments..

Pacifica Beach

3 Generations

Melissa Poppy Me

Grandpa

Wedding First Dance Barr & Table

Because those are the moments that really matter.

And to be completely honest, I saw this post going somewhere else. But I’m happy with the turn of events.

Food for Thought

What are your thoughts on the scale?