Dealing With Doubt

In my attempt to make this blog more about healthy living and my life in general, as opposed to “here’s what I’m eating!”, I’ve decided to do a little more sharing. Bear with me while I explore!

Doubt is something that rears its ugly face in everyone’s life from time to time. Whether you’re doubting the outfit that you put on, the workout you might have skipped in favor of drinks with your friends, or the food you’re eating, it can butt into your life when you least expect it.

Over the last 2 years, I’ve lost 30 lbs and maintained that loss with a healthy lifestyle. I have also, however, found myself being questioned by family, friends, and co-workers.

before-after

Before & After

“Are you still losing weight?”
“Are you eating enough?”
“I’ve never heard of that.. that’s not real food!”

After a while, it can really start to take a toll. I’ve definitely started doubting myself because the people around me question my lifestyle. And to me, that seems counterproductive. Why question someone who is trying to take pride in making the effort to live a healthy life when you wouldn’t outwardly question another person who stops at McDonalds everyday?

I’m not asking for praise when I break out my apple that I brought to a baseball game, knowing that I would want one [you bet your butt I did!], but I’m also certainly not asking for criticism either.

Salmon salad and an apple at the O’s game. It’s how I roll.

I’ll eat what I want to eat and your eat what you want. If you want to learn more about quinoa or chia seeds or coconut oil, ask me. I’m more than happy to talk. But if you’re going to tell me that I need to eat a piece of cake, keep it to yourself. I’m not going to tell you to go eat rabbit food.

Remember that we all make our own decisions based on what we feel is right for us. Seriously, have you seen how much I eat? Don’t question or criticize without truly understanding because you don’t always know the whole story as you think you may.

In a post from MizFit the other day, she says the following:

We create ourselves and our lives.

I dont have good physical genetics.  My body prefers to be soft/not muscular.  I watched women with better genetics gain muscle swiftly and easily. I came to a crossroads where I could either grow jealous or grow focused.  I chose the latter.  Resistance training taught me I am the sculptor of my body and my life.  I may not achieve goals as rapidly as some— but if I work tenaciously & tirelessly I’m ensured of progress.

Not only can I relate to this statement, it really struck a chord with me and has stuck with me the past few days. I choose the latter too. I work hard and eat the way that I choose because it’s what I want and it’s what I enjoy.

Grow focused.

Confidence is something you’re born with. Doubt is something you learn. So it’s about time I forget the doubt and find the confidence because I’ve worked my ass off to get where I am and damnit, I freaking enjoy kale!

Bagbys Ten Ten Rockfish Baltimore Maryland MD

Why would anyone say no to that salad?!

Food for Thought

How do you deal with doubt from friends or family?

How do you deal with doubting yourself?

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27 thoughts on “Dealing With Doubt

  1. This is a great post-btw your photo before and after is amazing! I think that for me I encounter people who don’t understand why I like eating healthy. I indulge a lot and I think that rightfully so, a lot of people get concerned about healthy/active individuals because many restrict their calories or don’t eat enough based on how many calories they burn. I’m really over this culture of eat 1200 calories a day and lose weight in our society. I think focusing on eating fresh, clean food that tastes delicious is a much better philosophy-and much yummier anyways 🙂

    • Thank you so much! I indulge too but people don’t always see it. Never the full story.

      I totally agree with you. Just the idea of 1200 calories makes me hungry! I’m definitely a volume eater.. you can eat a lot more veggies per calorie than meat 😉

  2. so proud of you for your first post that tells us what you’re thinking and gives us more insight into the real brittany! i really dislike the double standards that society has taught us. i love the point you brought up about how no one would question someone who eats fast food every day or comment on it, but people have to comment on my daily lunch salad. i always get asked at work if i’m a vegetarian – just because i eat salad for lunch? um, there is chicken in my salad, hello! it’s not ok to stereotype fit people just like it’s not ok to stereotype obese people. i’m really proud of you girl and i hope you get the positive feedback on this post that you deserve. xoxoxox

    • Thank you, Caitlin! It’s so funny, I get asked all the time if I’m vegetarian too.. it’s like people see green and they automatically assume. And we all know what assuming does.. 😉

  3. Yes, I can 1000000000000000% relate to this! After my 100+ pound loss, the first couple of years were filled with constant judgmental questions about what i ate and that i had gotten too thin. Eventually you learn to let it roll off your shoulders, because you can’t control what others think! You look fantastic and motivate me to hit the weights more!

    • You’re amazing! That’s so incredible that you lost 100+ lbs and absolutely something you should be proud of. I’m learning to let it roll more and more but it takes practice, for sure.

  4. I can completely relate to this! Every time I see my family they ask if I’m getting skinnier and always have to comment on what I choose to eat. I enjoy eating healthy, and it’s so hard for many people to understand how that can even be possible. Like you, I’ve worked hard to get to where I am right now, and I won’t let any negativity get in my way!

  5. Wonderful post! Sometimes I think that when people make critical comments, they’re just masking their own insecurities (or at least I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt!). But I agree, comments are frustrating when you’re trying your best to eat healthily and eat what’s right for you. Your before and after pics are great!

  6. I just wanted to say I think you look phenomenal in your after picture!
    Not that you didn’t already look good in your before.. but you are rocking some solid arms and quads now girl!
    And I can also seriously relate to being annoyed by others comments on how you eat.
    Right now I am actually taking in a lot of food (almost sometimes feels constant) but it is almost all extremely clean.
    Just the basics food without really anything added to it.
    I am in the process of getting stronger, adding muscle and recovering from stair climbing and (soon again) running etc and I need a lot of quality clean calories to do it but I do get quizzical looks at work about why I’m eating again and what I am eating doesn’t look appetizing etc.
    It’s all good honestly. I don’t really care because I also look and feel a lot different than they do and to me it is more than worth it.
    I do allow myself to cheat (and when I do I enjoy it) but the vast majority of my consumption is done for a reason and the vast majority of the population cannot relate to that at all. Keep the faith.. you are doing what works for you and that is the most important thing.
    And again congrats on a wicked cool transformation!
     
    I found you on Fitness Friday and I am glad that I did!
     
    Chris
    http://www.mavrocatstrength.com  
     

    • Thank you so much, Chris. I’m glad you found me too! Good for you for sticking with what you want and feeding your body what it needs to achieve your goals. Keep up the good work and thanks for reading!

  7. First of all, YOU LOOK STUNNING! STUNNING – and if you feel good about yourself, that’s paramount. Everyone who is questioning you is envious of your willpower and determination and only wish that they could do what you did and what you keep on doing.

    Secondly, I WANT THAT SALMON SALAD…. I am not asking for you to share with me, I am asking you to give it to me! LMFAO!! 😉

  8. Thank you for this. I get this all the time. My way of eating wasn’t my choice (due to surgery gone bad) but I am thankfull for it cause I am more healthy and focused on my lifestyle. Being from Alabama where eating habits are awful, I get questioned all the time. While someone sits across from the table at work and eats their fried chicken.

    • It’s so unfortunate that people can’t just accept it for what it is and move on. You wouldn’t say something to the person across from you eating fried chicken, so why should they say something to us?

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  10. I love this post! Thanks so much for sharing. I love your point that people feel so comfortable judging those who eat healthy or “not enough” but would never say the opposite to people eating unhealthy foods. I’ve wondered whether it’s their own insecurities that make them feel entitled to such loud opinions. Anyway, thank you!

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